A Page Turn

 I recently had the displeasure of finishing the last erring episode of a T.V. show I had been following for quite some time. It was a show that loved plot twists the first season ended with the hero finally destroying the main villain, but in doing so released an even greater one sending him on another quest to save the earth. So when the second season ended I shouldn’t have been surprised when just on the brink of finishing this epic quest they had been on for 6 months to save the world that *poof*… huge plot twist and everything is in jeopardy again and… “to be continued” comes across the otherwise black screen. Of course they never made a third season so I will never know whether the world was destroyed or not, oh well.

At times I feel like the adventure of life is similarly full of plot twists. Thankfully my show won’t be discontinued before the story is finished as He intended. But sometimes I feel a similar frustration in life just as I finish one chapter feeling that I barely survived it my life gets shaken like a classic boggle game and there is an all new quest on which to embark.

This is my life now, a page turn.  Standing on this side of my bachelors looking back at my schooling journey: being swept off white knuckled by the reigns of first year from my home, to trudging through the swamps of language acquisition and at times despair in Argentina, followed by two years of juggling far too many things whilst walking the tightrope of ministry over the pit of burn out, and all the way barely escaping the grasp of debt disillusionment and doubt. Looking at the mountains crossed, I know there must have been many times I was carried solely on the wings of miracles of grace.

Yet I am here, more aware of my inadequacies than ever before, yet all the more confident in His ability. But now as that page of life lands firmly in the past and more plot is revealed on this new page, here I stand on the brink of another journey I don’t yet fully understand… Adulthood.

What does it look like to be a Christian man in the St. Joseph County Michigan? How does one not digress to the life known before in such a familiar atmosphere? Life? Love? Work? Taxes? How does it all work? This is what my life consists of now, learning in the classroom of life. I invite you to join me again. I am dusting off the old blog (that is if blogs can collect dust… I suppose just about anything collects dust by sitting unused for 11 months). I do this, I hope, to be a help or encouragement to someone, but honestly I know this blog will probably never go viral, but it’s more for my sake I think. I like to write, it’s good for my soul. It helps me to refine my world view. To make sure I’m still thinking. I hope to write monthly. It seems more probable this chapter than the last but who knows what life will allow. However it would encourage me greatly if in some way these musings could be of use to someone. So please read, comment (it makes me feel good) and learn to live with me… or if you could teach me that would be great too!

Prayer

            In my seventeen years as a student this assignment to spend on hour in uninterrupted prayer has been my favorite assignment that I have received. It came in my Senior Seminar class close to the end of the bachelors studies and it was such a blessing to me I thought I would share it with you here in this forum that has been put off for some time, but I suppose better late than never. The assignment was this, simply spend an hour in uninterrupted prayer with the Lord and than write about your experience… this was my report.
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            It was incredibly refreshing to just spend time with Him. It wasn’t an hour on my knees talking the whole time. I went for a walk, and just talked to God and listened. About various things that came to my mind starting with asking the lord to help me reconcile how it works to pray without ceasing and to also heed the council of Ecclesiastes when it said let your words be few in the presence of God for He is in heave and you are on earth. But it was refreshing and intimate and wonderful. I have a lot of decisions in front of me right now and I am the kind of person that loves to talk things out, and I had been doing that with friends. It was as if the Lord said to me… why haven’t we talked about this Josiah? It felt as though he said it to me almost chuckling with a big smile on his face warmly inviting me to pour out my heart to him. So we walked and I chattered and he responded with the wind and the stars and peace… deep deep peace. It was me experiencing Him being the friend that sticks closer than a brother. The kind of intimacy I know He longs for in our relationship, the kind of intimacy I say I want but rarely take time seek with Him. It was gentle yet overwhelming, calming but made me want to sing and dance, and I might of. I like God. =]

            We also talked about the different paths on the table in from of me. I didn’t hear a voice from heaven or anything saying, do this or do that, but I had a different sort of peace about the decisions because I had talked them through with the most important someone.

            In my work as a Discipleship Coordinator and I met with many guys on a weekly basis and would sit with them for an hour or two and hash out life, build relationships with them, pray with them, and grow with them.  As I said to Him, “Lord I’ve missed you we really don’t do this enough”, God short of impressed on my heart, “well I am always available, and you meet with your guys regularly to show how you value them. So that they know they have you for those two hours and to show that you care. To just enjoy one another and grow the friendship, why don’t we do that?” So I want to start to have appointments or dates with God. These will be chunks of time I lay out to be with him that I treat seriously as appointments striving to honor them, when I am asked to do something to respond with a stern; sorry I am busy with a previous engagement.
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If I desire the reality of God in my life I need to treat Him as just that, a reality.  A real relationship in my life that really needs tending. I invite you to take my teacher’s challenge and if you do I would love to hear about it. I also would ask you to challenge me as you have opportunity and check and see if I am making priority of my appointments with Him. This is something I so struggle with and I would welcome challenges or even wisdom how to grow in that.